Living is personal

'Why do people seems to hold on to the decision to shit on us?"

For New Year, I will adopt a different approach to life. Instead of worrying about the non-existence duty to please others, the only thing to occupy my mind would be on myself and my mother.

I have my studies, my health, and my future to guard - in addition of the bad events that have befall on my mother. With her alarming health problem, horrible people intensely waging grudges against her, and the unfortunate financial crisis with credits to the super efficient government.

It is within thoughts that during this time, people around me would gather strength and channel it in, to hold me together when it is all falling apart. The opposite impression is the only support they decided to give. A part of me is in bliss to have distant my soul from others, having the chance to be with my mother for a whole week. No regret is spared for neglecting the pictures of laughters, as those are temporary.

The exact fact that no one can or wants to displace the unwanted news that is slowly reaching us on the 29th makes it definite.

I will be fine with the looks on me, spitting the nauseating words that do not even compute in rational minds. I will be fine with your(s) treatments that stem from imbecile minds. I will be fine with your(s) absence as you (s) serve me no purpose. I will be fine to leave you behind, just like how you left me when the struggles pull me in.

There will be no hesitation, to not see you bastard as friends.

If is it difficult to appreciate my feelings, then you should probably stop lingering, because I have keep all the fucks in my pocket and there is intention in handing them out just yet.


To the idiot hag that spread silly stories on how my mother faked her health problems to get out of work, my mother was bed-ridden for two months with me having to come from school every fucking day to care for her, and now there is a strong possibility that it will occur, again. So my wish for you that you will experience worse and suffer, because none of your children is civilised and actually care for you. Good luck going through that because a scum like you deserves nothing. And you are ugly and so are your daughters.

To the 'friends', I can only hope one day you will get your entitlement. Anyone with an audacity to say such about a person, would only belong in hell or a really bad place if you do not believe in those.

And to everyone else who has been rather impressive in writing me off, thank you for drawing me closer to my senses.

I have dispose friends before, so do not think you people are worthy for me to keep. To those who will never be close to me, pray that on the 29th, good news are for myself and mother to embrace. And God, I am inadequate to walk under these clouds.

and Hanna, thank you for stealing my idea of having that tattoo on the back of the neck. You little scoundrel.